Sunday, 13 May 2012

Final Results - Finally!!

Week 12 is done and dusted and feels like forever ago!!

Week 12 Day 7 ran very quickly into 5 more days until my Kiddies' Birthday party and a To-Do list longer than my arm!!

So the Birthday Party Bonanza is also done and dusted and it's time to FINALLY sit down and update my Blog with my Week 12 results.

I have a very clear and distinct impression of these photos and even though I have been calling them my "After" shots - they most definately are not "After" anything except 12 weeks of hard work, clean eating and dedication up the wazoo!! In other words - this is far from "The End" for me on this journey, my quest to find the Best version of myself will continue with new goals and new aspirations and new bouts of dedication and the hard work that follows. 

That said - lets bring on the bragging for how well (yes I can own it - I did well) I did on Round 1 2012 Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation.....

Over all Stats:

Weight Lost        -     1.5kg on the scales
Cms Lost            -    41.5cm on the Tape Measure
Body Fat % Lost -    8% on the Callipers!! - My BF% went from close to 30% to 21.7% !!!

My poor husband during that last week - putting up with me - I was up and down like a yo-yo, I was so excited about how far I'd come one minute and then was doubting myself and slapping myself the next!! I was complaining that my tummy was sticking out like a pregnant person, I was whinging that my bum still hadn't changed - then I'd smash a PB at the gym and was high again - up, down, up down.

Friday was a down day - I was dreading going to the PT to be pinched for the calliper test!! I was SURE that I wasn't going to have much change since week 8....I told my husband before I went off "Expect me to come home crying, I'm sure my results are going to be underwhelming!!"...doom and gloom I walked in, found the PT and begged to get it over with.

The PT was SHOCKED and AMAZED at my results - he even didn't believe some of the pinchs and did them again and again because he thought what he was seeing on the callipers just couldn't possibly be true!!

Yay me!!!

He was flawed that over 12 weeks I could lose 8% of my Body Fat - My goal was originally 5-6% and I wasn't sure if that was aiming too high....and I SMASHED it!! I felt like my feet didn't hit the ground as I floated out of the gym and all the way home.  This result gave me the joy and elation I was looking for - now I was excited for final weigh in, measure and photos the next morning.

So here are the photos, that I was so nervous about taking, the photos that show the blood sweat and tears (oh the many tears) of the 12 weeks.




Front view

The Dreaded Back View

Side View
The Bend...Look at how much Tummy flab I lost!!!
Remember that Old Tuumy Shot My soon took???

And a Flexing Shot of course :)
 I am looking forward to Melbourne this weekend where I will Celebrate with a friend and fellow 12WBT'ioner Tara all the hard work and fantastic results we achieved this round.

Michelle has announced that Margie Winner of The Biggest Loser 2012 will be training us at the group[ workout and will Co-Host the Finale Party too!!!

I am so freakin' PUMPED it is unbelievable!!

This week I'll be working on working out so I still look good in my finale dress - after the sugar coma I found myself in post Birthday Party - and also re-focusing to complete some pre-season Tasks for Round 2 2012 to set myself up for further success at fitness and at life!!

Bring on the Party!!!!

Thursday, 3 May 2012

Catching Up

I can't believe I'm in week 12!! (aaaaaaagggggghhhhhhhhh)

I have been so so so busy lately, blogging and finishing my 12wbt weekly tasks have not made it to the top of my To-Do list....and even things on the top of my To-Do list are not getting crossed off!!

So I thought I'd go through some of the tasks that I maybe started but never finished, or perhaps never did at all!!

Week 10's Suprise Weekly Task was to make a 2 min video describing:  How is the 12WBT helping you to make the impossible possible? and up load it onto YouTube..... well I have never uploaded anything onto Youtube, I don't know how to download videos from my phone, I don;' have power point and even if I did I don't know how to use it!! The whole thing got me down because I had a plan as to how I wanted my video to go and never got to complete the task. I watched heaps of videos made by my peers and I was so moved by them I wanted so much to share my story too... So in the interest of making the impossible possible (excuse the pun) I am going to put the script and the photos that I would have made into a power point presentation onto my blog page and post it in the forums.  Better late then never I reckon!!

So Here is the soundtrack I chose - play the music and read along - hopefully it'll kind of be like watching a video on Youtube!! (yeah maybe not)


*******************************


Skinny: [skin-ee] very lean or thin; 
        emaciated: a skinny little kitten.


It seems all I have ever wanted was to be "skinny".....It was all I desired, all I seemed to ever strive for....



Hatred: [hey-trid]
to dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility toward; detest
 
It seems I have never known anything other than self loathing and self hate....
 

Starve, binge, purge, starve, binge perge.....telling myself every minute of everyday....

"You'll be fat forever!!"

and other terrible terrible things...


I would never speak to my children, my friends, my worst enemy the way I would speak to myself...


I always focused on unrealistic and unhealthy dreams and desires.....

a selection of previous diary pages.....


And then along came Michelle Bridges....


She taught me the importance of self love, self respect and self truth.....


She taught me to set Healthy, Obtainable, Achieveable goals....


She Taught me that I can....


And so I am....


Strong: [strawng, strong]
having, showing, or able to exert great bodily or muscular power; physically vigorous or robust mentally powerful or vigorous of great moral power, firmness, or courage: strong under temptation.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Now it's not all about the skinny....




And it's not all about the physical...





Michelle Bridges has helped me change my mindset and she held my hand as I turned my "impossible" into my "possible"....


Look at me now!!! and look out week 12 and beyond!!

**************************************




 

Friday, 20 April 2012

Epic Temptation Challenge

I feel like a Biggest Loser Contestant in a major temptation challenge. 

This last week saw me attend the Veterinary Nursing Council of Australia's annual conference at the Mariott Resort - Surface Paradise (Oh my goodness - I just re-read that sentence and I had typed "Sugars Paradise" - wow!! Sugar on the brain or what??)

What I was expecting was 3 days of informative, educational classes, exhibitors displays to peruse and some social entertainment amongst my peers - what I got was a 3 day Temptation challenge.  I knew there was food was provided - On the registration form asking if I had any special dietary requirements I wrote down "Vegetarian, Calorie Controlled" - yeah yeah, ha ha, as if!!!

My days went a little something like this:
Morning Tutorial
Morning Tea - Muffins the size of my head, Pasteries and Flans, Scones with Jam and Cream
Mid Morning Tutorial Session
Lunch - Variety of Cold salads and Hot Meats - WHITE rolls
Dessert - plate after plate after plate of cakes, flans, slices, tarts
Mid Afternoon Tutorials
Afternoon Tea: Cupcakes and Icecream
Afternoon Tutorial Session.

Not to mention each exhibitor had another food related gimick to get you to their stall some of which included - Fairy Floss, chocolates, an icecream bar, lollies....

I had NO idea on Day one that I would be blind sided by so much freakin temptation!! It really was extreme and utterly rediculous, not to mention unnecessary!! I was slighty outraged.

I had a good friend with me who is also calorie counting and has goals of her own to be her best self and I am so so grateful that we had each other to hold onto during the sugar laden snow storm!!

I am SO proud to say that I got through all 3 days without falling prey to temptation.  I put up my "No" shieled and it never faulted!! I also thought that 3 full days at conference including travelling back and forth from the Gold coast would interfere with my Training schedule - but it did not!! I managed to get up super early or get to the gym super late to ensure I didn't miss a work out. 

Go Me!!

Here's a little photo montage of some of the treats I resisted in my mammth 3 day temptation challenge...I mean whilst I was on Conference.....



Thursday, 12 April 2012

Face your Fears Week 9


Every week of 12WBT there is a new Suprise weekly task - This week is all about facing your fears!! Here is the note from Mish.....

Face Your Fears!

Time to show me what you're made of!! The 12WBT is not just about nutrition and training it's also about re-training your mind and facing up to your fears! 

Those fears might be walking to your letterbox or jumping out of a plane!

What's the most inventive, exciting, thrilling, challenging activity you have done since you have joined 12WBT? It could be wearing a bright red frock to a party or climbing a mountain. It has to be something that has really push you out of your comfort zone and made you think twice about what you were about to embark on. 

Everyones fears are different - when I do this with my Biggest Loser contestants it really shows us what they are made of.

------


So yesterday I pushed myself right smack bang in the middle of that zone that is far, far from that zone named "comfort" and rocked up for my first tattoo!!

Did it make me think twice about what I was about to embark on??? Ummmm YES!!! It made me think 20x or more!!

I have been dreaming of this ideal tattoo, visualising it, focusing on it, planning the day when I would get it.  I listed it as one of the rewards I would give myself after this round of Lean and Strong - when I had a midsection to be proud of!! Because the tattoo of my dreams is one which wraps around my side. 

So the plan was to wait until I was ripped, had the 6 pack of my dreams and could lie comfortably in front of a tattooist half naked without being self- conscious of my body.  So when people asked to see my ink I could rip up my top proudly and show them my new body art and my new smokin hot abs and be proud to show them both off.......

So do I have a six pack?? No.

Will I feel 100% comfortable showing people my tattoo?? No.

Do I have a midsection that I am proud of? well........ yes, I guess I kinda do. 

It is far from the six pack I desire (focus on, dream about, trudge off to the gym 6 days a week to achieve), it is not even flat!! But it has shrunk a HEAP since I embarked on 12WBT and even more during this round of Lean and Strong. So I am not 100% proud of my shrinking Mummy Tummy - but I certainly am proud of how much I have achieved so far and evey bit of hard work it has taken mne to get here!!

And this week is all about facing my fears right??

I was terrified of lying half naked in front of a man I didn't know - no one sees my tummy!! NOBODY!!! I'm still getting about in my suction undies and leotards under my clothes, I am not confident to let them go just yet.  This is what I was so afraid of - being seen!!! Oh and the pain factor of course..... oh yes, the pain factor! I woke up yesterday morning and totally pushed the pain factor out of my head - I kept busy, I thought positive thoughts - I knew I could use my positivity to shove any thoughts of fear and pain down, I just wanted to focus on the positive "By tonight I will have my tattoo and it will be over"  Just like embarking on childbirth, "After this I will have my baby and all the pain will be insignificant" - then I remembered that the pain of childbirth is SO not insignificant!! but I pushed away the fear, down ....way down.....so far down that I gave myself quite the tummy ache - nervous toilet stops all afternoon!!(Too much information???)

I was so nervous I felt sick.

I was so so so grateful that my heavily tattooed husband was there to support me, to be by my side.  He's never in 10 years wanted me to have a tattoo, so his support and encouragement through the whole thing was priceless.  Although he was grinning, camera poised to take a photo of my face when the needles made that first contact with my skin....

I am so proud of myself!! I was so scared and I did it!! I was so freakin brave, I didn't flinch or complain during the 3 hours that it took to complete.  I was most afraid that I'd get half way through and decide I couldn't finish it.  I can honestly say it did not hurt as much as I thought it would and I really think my positivity and confidence in my mindset helped attribute to that.


There's that first moment - gripping the head rest much???

Little more used to it now

Another tattooist REALLY helped me through the last half hour when it was starting to get really tough chatting to me about random things. She did make many comments that I was insane for getting my first ever tattoo down my side, but pain is pain right?? I knew where I wanted it and I wasn't being talked out of it by anyone - I knew I could do it!

So the script you see is a quote from the inspirational Deepak Chopra - I stumbled upon it whilst searching for positivity and inspirations of strength before embarking on Lean and Strong.  I was wanting to put my energy into preparing both physically and mentally for the next stage.  He says

"I stand strong in my personal power - With true power that comes from within, nothing is beyond my reach"

I have focused on this, I have chanted this to myself over and over again since embracing it last December.  I made the first half the title of this blog and the second half is now inscripted on my body forever and ever, so I can always remember, no matter how low I get that I do possess a truck load of personal power and I truely believe that any thought, dream or desire that I have CAN become my reality. 

The butterflies, although very pretty, are to symbolise my transfortion and growth from a self doubting, self loathing negative, half empty person, to one full of self belief and the ability to turn any negative situation into one with a positive light!




Wednesday, 11 April 2012

Easter Success


Well Easter 2012 has been and gone - THANK GOD!!!

For me it was a series of highs and lows and I'm trying not to get caught up in the lows - but I'll start with them:

Low

My training MOST definately suffered over the 4 day weekend - The gym was closed for 2 days and had limitted opening hours for the other 2....neither fitting in with my work/sleep/travel schedule.


I absolutely could not have trained - even though I wanted too.  Even to me this sounds like excuses, excuses, excuses, The long weekend started and I was already 2 days and 1 night into a 7 day working week- looking down the line at 4 Easter Public Holiday Night shifts.  To top it off my little family were up at Bribie- so on very (very very very) little sleep I was travelling back and forth.  I calculated on Sunday that over the previous 4 days I'd had 12.5hours sleep...TOTAL!! So averaging 3hrs sleep a night, 10hour shifts and dangerously travelling to Bribie at 2am and back at 2pm - I was the walking DEAD!!  Training was on my mind- but certainly not on my agenda - shattered!!


High

I made it through Easter keeping true to my word that Choclate has absolutely no place in my diet.  I am so proud of myself!! Sooooooo much temptation - I feel like a Biggest Loser Contestant playing temptaion!! They have a 24hour Tempation challenge this week - my chocolate tempation seems never ending!! The kids have SO much chocolate in the house!! They are not big chocolate eaters and are getting through it SO slowly! I packed some up and sent it out of the house today (Thanks to my Chocolate Loving Bestie for taking some for the team!!).  I will stay strong and I have no doubt that I'll live through this sipping my Jarrah Hot Chocolate to get my choccie fix for 46cal!!


Low

My nutrition was NOT squeeky clean over the Easter 4 days! Friday was great - squeeky clean - I survived lunch at my mums with cheesecake, potato bake, garlic bread, chocolate. Saturday was good - mostly clean (too many pretzels!!), Sunday was a disaster -breaky was good - but thats where it ended - poor choices for snacks (3 scotch finger biscuits a handful of cheezels and too many wafer biscuits) saw me skip lunch - by 9pm I was at work with no food and no clue!! I was deleriously tired and extremely hungry and.......ordered pizza!! I ate 3...no make that 4 pieces of vegetarian pizza from pizza hut.....I didnt do the ordering so I ended up with pan base!! Noooooo!!!! I tidied up by Monday but I was still disappointed in myself over my absense of training and self control. 

High

.....actually resisting chocolate is really my only high..... I wish there was more to report!!


So I'm back, my gym is open, the snack box is closed and I am ALL OVER smashing out what's left of the next 4 weeks!

I hit the gym this morning and week 9 training is HARD!! (Really hard!!) I think this is where the true test for me will lie.  I've been travelling along nicely - I have been smashing it out at the gym, LOVING the workouts - but getting a taste of week 9 this morning and writitng out the weeks workouts in my gym journal, I have realised that this last 4 weeks is going to test me, physically and mentally. 

I wondered this morning whether I am tough enough to see it out - I shouldn't have, because now I feel a little (well maybe more than a little) fear in my guts that I might not have it in me!!

The key to get through this will have to absolutely be combining Mish's Motto: Consistency Consistency Consistency - JFDI!!! and the little personal mantra I have been focusing on "I Stand Strong in my Personal Power - with true power from within - nothing is out of my reach!!"  I read it before the start of the round and I have absolutely drawn upon in time and time again when I feel like giving up.  I must remember my Personal Power each time I think "I Can't" and focus on the "I can" or even better the "I bloody will!!"

Here we go!!!!!





Wednesday, 4 April 2012

I'm a Loser!!

Week 1: Lost 1.3kg since the beginning of PreSeason
Week 2: Gain 600g
Week 3: Gain 100g
Week 4: Gain 300g
Week 5: Scales Boycot!! 
Week 6: Gain 200g
Week 7: Forgot to weigh in - what?!!
Week 8: A loss!!! A loss!!! My first loss of the round!!! Lost 700g!!

How can I even begin to describe how happy I am today??!!

I am soooooo pleased that I have finally had a loss!!

The mental strain of Lean and Strong has so far been 10x more difficult than the physicall strain of the workouts!! The workouts I FREAKIN LOVE! I am stronger than I have ever been - my personal bests are outdone every single week, I am upping my weights almost weekly, beating times, reps and challenges that Mish has set and ones that I have set for myself, not to mention despite my lack of weight on the scales I have more defintion that I have ever had in my life - "but at what cost?" I was starting to wonder..."I am going to go BONKERS if I do not lose some weight soon" is another thought rolling through my head day in day out.

The knocks that I have been receiving (all dished out by nobody but myself of course) have been countless - over and over and over again.

But through it all I can say that yes I have whinged, yes I have been down, yes I have absolutely let it get to me, yes I have driven my husband mental (there may have been more than a few occasions where I start pulling at the loose skin on my abdomen shaking it in front of him angrily), yes I have moaned and complained about my seemingly NIL success..... but through it all I have stayed strong!! I have not once given up, I have gotten up at 430am and trudged off to the gym after crying late into the night before, I have completed Saturday Super Sessions between Super shifts at work, I have come home from a long day cooked dinner for the family and THEN headed out to the gym so my workout wasn't missed, I have been the last to leave the gym at night and been the first to walk through the doors the next morning.... I have SUCCEEDED so far at seeing this through and this consistency will see me suceed in the end I am sure of it (note to self - come and re-read this post next time you feel like you are a failure at this program!!).

I have not and will not give up on this.  This is a promise I made to myself and to Michelle Bridges and I don't even care if she hasn't a clue who I am - I am a woman of my word and God Damn it I will see this through!!

4 and a half weeks to go - 2.5kg to lose until I have reached a goal of being under 60kg!! That's just over 600g a week - BIG numbers for someone my size and not overly realistic.  To prevent myself from having a meltdown at week 12 weigh in, I'm going to.....deep breath........let go of the weight loss goal....... eeeeeekkkkk can't believe I've even said it out loud (well in print) - I will focus now on shredding these last stubbon wobbly bits as Mish ups the cardio for the last month and I will instead base my end goal on looking in the mirror and liking what I see....... well I can honestly say this might be a bigger goal than the fight against the scales because my first memories of self loathing and disgust came early, at around the age of 7 - so here's to looking in the mirror for the first time in 23years and being proud of what I see!!

Big Call........ But I got this!!


Sunday, 1 April 2012

Run Rabbit Run


Week 6's SSS was the Run Rabbit Run and I still haven't conquered it!! I was so keen to smash out this workout - it sounded brutel, it sounded like hard work and a terrific challenge!!

I wanted in!!

So it's not Saturday - Its Monday - but what the Hell - I want this Rabbit off my back!!

So I slept through my alarm at 430am and slept in until 8am (love school Holidays!!) - so I decided to do it at home instead of the gym. I read through the workout - I can totally pull this off at home!!

I scrounged around for some equipment..... The Run Rabbit Run consists of 4 circuits of 3 exercises each completed 4 times through and separated by a 400m run . 

Well I have my treadmill for the sprints......


Some old 5kg hand weights for the "Dumbell Squat Presses" and the "Walking Lunges with Over Head Weights".....


A rusty old Bar Bell with some rusty old weights for the "Up right rows"......


Threw two chairs together for some "Tricep Dips"......


This unmowed retaining wall will do instead of a box for the "Box Jumps" .....


And a bucket......just in case.....



So I'm all set - start the clock......

Holy Smokes - that was one hell of a workout - numerous times I had the burps, head hung over - but I didn't need the bucket after all.

It was hard going - it was hot (Hmmmm the air-conditioned gym at 5am would have been alot more comfortable than in my yard in the sun at 10am) and there was a moment when Fat Kate was hunched over the Pool Table gasping for air and talking me into quitting - But I didn't - I completed it all 100%.

The recommended speed for the runs was 11km/hr on the treadmill and I was smashing the last 200m out at 12km/hr (mainly just to make it go faster!!) so I'm pretty pleased with that.

I got finished in 1hr and 3 minutes - despite the fact that I forgot to turn off my heart monitor as I was flat out on my back for over 5 mins convincing myself that I could get up :)


The kids came down before I was finished and where cheering me on through the last circuit and the last sprint - There is nothing in the world like hearing the sound of your kids voices shouting "You can do it Mummy!!! You are fast!!! You are strong!!!! - absolute magic!!
So My day of training is not over yet - I shall go to the gym this afternoon to complete my Lean and Strong Monday Workout - I'm certainly not going to fall behind like I did by missing Monday last week.